Big Red part 3

So we find ourselves at Sgt. Hughes' house in a small town called North Pole. North Pole Alaska is between Fairbanks and Eielson Air Force Base. His wife is also an Air Force enlisted person but holds a second job at night as a waitress at a bar, so she hasn't seen us pile into her house after evacuating her new, recently puked-in car. We are sitting around the living room deciding what to do next. Tim says, "Well, I have to take Dane home. Robert, you and Ron sit tight here while I'm gone. Dane only lives about ten minutes from here. Then we will decide how you guys are going to get back to the base." I said "O.K." Ron was already asleep. I was looking around the room after Tim and Dane left, wondering what kind of people I was getting acquainted with. I felt that I had made a big mistake. What was I thinking? Here I am 23 years old. I'm deep in the heart of Alaska with literally one road that leads out of here through Canada and down to Washington or Montana. I was with people from all over the country in a place where it snows in September and doesn't stop until late April. They don't call it springtime, they call it breakup. I am in for a long tour of duty. Alaskan assignments are considered overseas assignments. Overseas assignments are classified as either long or short tours. Eielson AFB is a long tour. Three years long. Ten minutes comes and goes. Twenty minutes. Then I fell asleep. I awake to the sound of someone coming into the house. Oh good. Tim is back. Now it's time to decide how a drunk, underage Ron and a nervous, sober, newbie are going to...wait, it's not Tim. It's his wife. She sees me sitting on the floor. Ron asleep on th floor next to me, and says, "Who are you? What's going on?" "Hi. I'm Robert. Tim should be here soon. He went to take Dane home." I looked at the time and over an hour had passed. Where could they be? She didn't look too happy. Just then, Tim comes in. Good. He tries to explain to his wife what happened but she doesn't want to hear it. Ron wakes up and says "What's going on? Tim said, "We need to get you guys back to the base. Robert, can you drive Ron's car?" I said "Well, no, not really. I don't know how to drive stick shift." Tim said, well, I can't let Ron drive like this I and I really don't want to drive you all the way there and then come back, so you are going to have to try." I said, "Even if I could manage to drive stick without burning out the clutch, I wouldn't know how to get back to the base. I'd get lost. It's dark and snowing and I don't know the way. By the way, what took you so long? You said ten minutes." Tim replied, "Dane couldn't remember where he lived." I rolled my eyes and said, "Anyway, the security guards at the gate will stop to check our IDs at this hour. When they see that Ron is under age and drunk, we will both get sent to correctional custody. (Air Force detention/jail). Ron immediately piped up with an angry retort. "NO WAY! He's not driving my car! I pay the mother f***ing bills on that car. He's not going to F***up my clutch. I can get past the guards! Adam and I once both drank a 5th of Jack and were able to do it. All I need is a pack of Big Red!" Tim looked at me and said, OK. both of you sleep here tonight. I'll take you back in the morning." Stay tuned for part 4. - The Day After.